I’d just like to voice that I’m a fat babe and I own an Abercrombie and Fitch hoodie, mens size large. IM FAT AND IM WEARING YOUR BRAND. MWAHAHAHAHAHAHA. that is all.
Genuinely unsure of where my life is heading.
I mean, I have literally no idea what I even want anymore! I guess I want a career because it seems the most logical thing to do, alongside obviously being a necessity- I do need to earn some form of money at some point after all. But I’m in a spiral of doubt and uncertainty in regards to the direction I should go cause I just don’t know what will make me happy. I don’t know if anything will make me happy.
All I can see right now is that the best three years of my life are coming to an end. I can’t see any further than living with my friends and living independantly.
I’ve always been quite struck on the idea that getting a degree and entering into a rewarding career is the best thing for me but I’m really starting to question it. I know I’m going to do it, I have no doubt, but I’m not sure I will be happy even after acheiving all of my goals in this respect.
I’m not for one second suggesting that I want to start a family or anything, I couldn’t be any further away from considering that as an option right now! I do feel, however, a little jealous of my old school friends who are content in their relationships and living in their own houses. This is something I have no prospect of acheiving and yet, without sounding ego-centric and bitchy, I have done alot more with my life and strived to acheive more than them.
I’m just stuck in a depressive little rut, resultant of my disdain towards the idea of having to move back home and leave all this behind.
University has opened my eyes to a bigger and better world and I’m not sure I want to regress backwards into my old life.